"A HOT TIME IN THE CITY FOR BESTER"
By Joan Martin
Sheridan, although reluctant to do so, asks Garibaldi to go with Bester to search for the ancient group known as "The Trio". One of whom they call "The Wizard" in the hopes of asking him for a "heart" for Bester (because he has none). The next person they seek from the Trio is called "The Keeper of the Conscience" (who is rumored to look like a cricket). In the hopes he will help Bester find his conscience (god knows he needs one). Lastly they must seek out and find "The Guardian of the Photomat" so he can help
Bester, get his negative personality developed!! Garibaldi doubts they will ever be successful but does as
heís asked, because Sheridan is his friend.
They board a 2 man shuttle and enter hyper-space through the jumpgate. Where they come across a large ominous
vessel of technologically advanced unknown origin. Their shuttle is brought aboard and find it belongs to a race known as GFO!! They have been in pursuit of the one called Bester for crimes against "DA MAN", an individual they adore, honor and respect. Needless to say the intended journey to find "The Trio" doesn't happen!!! YET!!
They take them back to their home world: ELYOD (btw...thatís Jerryís last name backwards!) Where he (Bester) is to stand trial for his crimes and punished if found guilty (and he will be, because it's my story and I said so!: So Let It Be Written So Let It Be Done!!) he is to be taught a lesson. Garibaldi is told he will be released, because it's not him that has done harm to "DA MAN". And because the upper GFO government (who are the females of the species) have taken a keen interest in him (this must be
Garibaldiís lucky day "wooooohooooo")!! He is told he can leave after the trial, and will be taken back to where he was originally found but is informed he must not interfere and will not be allowed to do so. Heís treated well by GFO, given the best quarters, and other amenities they have to offer.
Besterís punishment is to be burned at the stake as done long, long ago by their ancient ancestors for those who
committed crimes. He is placed up on the stake. and asked "Do you have any last requests?", he responds "Do you
really want to hurt me, do you really want to make me cry?" He looks down at Garibaldi and says "help me"!!!!!!! But, alas Garibaldi cannot because heís being held back and restrained by those assigned to guard him. GFOknows all about what Bester did to Garibaldi, and they know he told you that you cannot harm him or knowingly allow harm to come to him The court executioner lights the base of the stake, and because youíre being restrained by others. You can't help him from being roasted, (and it isn't by Dean Martin)!!!!! GFO tells you they know what he did to you, and they think it's wrong. Then programming you so you can't harm him, or let harm come to him. BUT ... If you're being restrained (HEHEHE) What can you do, right? This is gonna teach that
nasty little toad a lesson, isn't it??
The hooded court executioner stares at Bester then looks at Garibaldi. You think to yourself "Is that roast beef I smell?" And you can't figure out why you just thought that, when all of sudden the court executioner rips his hood off and reveals himself to be "A Swedish Chef ", he begins babbling in Swedish and takes out a giant bbq brush, dips it in a vat sitting next to him and starts to coat Bester in butter. Ahhhhh, you can always tell it's summer time, with the sound of beef sizzling on the bbq (well, at he stake really "steak"????) HP or BBQ sauce?
"Yumpin Yiminee" he says, and realizes he forgot to add the seasoning.
He picks up a cup of salt and starts to sprinkle it on him. Then he hums the song "The Kid Is Hot Tonight" out loud so Bester can hear him!!!!! :-P
Garibaldi thinks to himself, "how odd this is!" And if he was back on the Bab5 station and he was still head of security, he'd have to arrest the chef and charge him with: "A Salt and Buttery!! Hehehehehe Then losing control of himself Garibaldi grins evilly, saying his best Marvin Martian impression ...."Isn't It Delightful??"
You suddenly have an inspiration hit you and say out loud "DAMN IT, and here I am with no marshmallows DOHHHH!"
The flames, are now almost 1/2 way up Besterís body, without warning Garibaldi gets the urge to sing. and says so out loud. GFO encourages him by saying in unison "Sing ... sing a song ... sing out loud sing out strong. Don't worry if it's not good enough, for anyone else but you!" So, you start to sing "Best nuts roast (ummm, I mean Chestnuts) roast on an open fire !!! Bester yowls in pain (sort of gives new meaning to the term weenie roast or BBQíd peaNUTS doesn't it?).
Am I being cruel? "YOU DAMN SKIPPY" I am (serves him right for messing with "DA MAN!) Iíll get you my pretty...and your little dog too!! You mess with DA MAN and you mess with me and no one does that (hmm not true, I can think of one person Iíd let
mess with me---<Giggles>) NEVER, EVER pick on the my favorite character, it disrupts my drooling sessions over him). GET IT? GOT IT? GOOD!!!!
ELYODís "president" leader of the people of GFO gives her name as Noelle!! She steps up to Garibaldi, along with her aide in charge of PR (Prized Retaliator / Public Relations) who also introduces herself to Garibaldi, as JoanDarc. They say to him, we wish to ease your mind of the burden of all the things he (pointing to Bester) has done to you. Is there anything you want us to do to you (I mean do "for you"!) Just Kidding Jerry!!! (Gee I hope you're laughing)! I sure hope you have a sense of humor (not as much as
I hope Walter does though! Hehehe).
You ponder that idea and say "Ummmmmmmmm, well yes .... As a matter of fact there is!!!!! I want him to confess all that he's done to me! I want proof of the confession and need it recorded!
Noelle and JoanDarc say "And so you shall have this" and say to Bester "Are you feeling just a tad warm n toasty, do you kind of feel like a giant Pop Tart Mr. Bester?" Would you like the pain to go away? Do as Mr. Garibaldi asks and it'll stop (well maybe it will) !!!
Bester agrees to this! GFO people put the flames out and escort Bester to a room where he makes the recorded confession. The confession is given to Garibaldi!!! Then Besterís mind is wiped clean of what has just happened to him and he is now the one who is reprogrammed. The 2 of them are to be returned to the Babylon5 station.
To ensure that Bester doesn't later claim the recording was made under torture and he was forced to make it! (If he ever does remember anything ). The president sends her aide JoanDarc and a crew of 11 GFO special forces military personnel along with them. This group of people are specially trained by GFO, to withstand the deepest attempts at telepathic probes by anyone! Especially members of the psi corps (no matter what their rating is)!!! They are all trained in different aspects to counter any possible method Psi Corps may try to use. All of them are skilled combat pilots, and have other training in other fields. Hand to hand combat and martial arts masters, weapons and explosives specialists, communications & computer (hackers) specialists, espionage, terrorism and counter terrorism, science and technology specialists, etc., etc., etc. They are also there to protect Garibaldi and anyone else from any retaliation by the Corps!!! As long as one of the GFO people are near Garibaldi, he is totally safe from them. So he doesn't mind them being "close to him"!!!! :-) They all have the ability to not only block mind probes on themselves, but anyone they are near as well!!!!!!
Needless to say Garibaldi loves having them nearby!!!!!!!!! He explains their presence there at the station as a new race of people
they came across. And believes they can be a great asset to the new alliance, the station and himself because they have special skills that can be used to aide him in performing his duties.
Sheridan is unsure of this sudden appearance of this race, but Garibaldi and the GFO representative JoanDarc assure him they mean no harm and only wish to be a part of the new alliance. And they have "much" to offer it! Sheridan accepts them at their word and of course because, Garibaldiís believes they can help them greatly!!!. Sheridan assigns the person in charge (JoanDarc) of the GFO group and her people to Garibaldi. For use as he sees fit. Even as Garibaldiís personal bodyguard! If Bester starts anything,
she'll do her best Cowardly Lion, "Wizard of Oz" impression and say "Go on, Go on ..Put Em up, Put Em Up, Iíll fight ya with one arm behind my back, Iíll fight ya with one leg in the air"!! Iíll kick your scrawny chicken a** up and down the station!! ROFLMAO!!
They prove themselves valuable allies to Sheridan , Garibaldi and everyone else on board Babylon5. Especially with their advanced technology they possess!! The best part about them, is the fact that Garibaldi gets along so well with all of them and has much in common with them. They are extremely loyal to him and he now feels that way about them as well. But most importantly they dislike Psi Corps (Psi Cops) especially Mr. Bester, as much as he does!! And now he knows that the shoe's on the other foot where Bester
is concerned. And finally Bester and his group have met their match which pleases Garibaldi beyond his wildest dreams! Garibaldi knows that Bester hates GFO! But Bester doesn't really know why he hates them, he just does. Which Garibaldi figures is OK, because anyone who Bester hates, he loves!!! Besides, he knows the truth about how GFO helped him clear his name from what Bester and Psi Corps did to him by making him turn against Sheridan, with the recorded confession from Bester. And of course all those warm thoughts that GFO gave him to remember!!
This allows our "hero" to go to bed at night thinking of warm and happy thoughts and finally at last be FREE from the stuff that Psi Corps (specifically Psi Cops and Bester) had done to him. That the "Truth" is out, and he's even with Bester now. And that there's not a damn thing Bester can do about it!!!!!! So now this story ends (for now) of how our hero (M. Garibaldi) had the perfect ending to the perfect day, content in the knowledge that Bester had:
"A HOT TIME IN THE CITY!!!!!!!!"